1/13/2017 0 Comments The Fear of CommitmentWhat is love? Is it the butterflies we feel in our stomach when we think of someone or hang around them? Or the way they make us smile without trying? Is it the sinking feeling we get when we picture life without them? Or is it the physical affection they show us? If these are the definitions of love, do you think these feelings will last forever, or will they fade? One of the biggest reasons for couples to divorce is that they just don't feel love anymore, or aren't as "in love" as they thought they were. Does this mean that love isn't just a feeling?
To me, love means commitment. Beck once said, "The degree to which we love someone is the degree to which we are committed." Many of us "millennials" have commitment issues. So, if love and commitment are equal, then we not only have commitment issues, but love issues. We use terms like “catching feelings” instead of liking someone. We only do the bare minimum to keep a relationship going, rather than giving our all. We have “NCMOs” (non-committal make outs). We “hang out” so that we can be around someone we like, but still have our options open since we’re not technically “dating.” Why? When did this suddenly become the “norm”? Maybe it was when we decided that whatever was on social media was true or right. Or the time everyone else’s opinions mattered more than our own self-worth. Or the day we started seeing people as objects instead of human beings with feelings like our own. No matter what day it started, we can choose the day to change it. We can decide to love and commit to someone, rather than play games. We can have a successful marriage and family for the rest of our lives if we will fully commit ourselves to them. Ask anyone who has been married for a significant amount of time, the key to a successful family is commitment.
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