3/4/2017 0 Comments Family Crisis![]() In all of our lives, we are faced with opposition. As individuals, we get stressed out almost on a daily basis. Just as each person gets stressed out, so does the family as a whole. So, this is all about stressors that families go through and how to cope with these things. If a house is considered strong, it is more than likely built on a solid foundation. The foundation holds it together and makes it stable, especially when a lot of “stress” happens like wind, rain, and other natural disasters. Just like houses, we can build our family on strong foundations that will keep us from falling apart when disasters hit. Some ways to build that foundation are:
When problems arise in a family, things can become chaotic. However, strong families have habits to fall back on. For example, if a family moves to a new town and no one really feels they fit there, but they still sit down to the table and eat together, things seem more natural and at home. Even though stress hits whole families, you must understand that each person might see or deal with things differently. There is a model that explains a family’s experience during a trial. It is called the ABCX model. Actual event (stressor) Both resources & response Cognitions (thoughts/interpretation); definition of problem Total eXperience of the family The most recent stress in my family, is the death of my grandpa. When I thought about how we dealt with his passing, I realized that we had the stressor even before he passed away. It started when he was diagnosed with ALS. Because we had the diagnosis far before, we all started to prepare for the time when grandpa might not be doing very well. After struggling through this disease, the day of his passing came. When I found out that he had passed, I was so relieved that his struggling was over. However, there were many who were deeply hurt that grandpa was gone. This trial might have torn my family apart, but we tried to keep things normal around us. We talked about what we were feeling and thinking. We tried to accept the differences in opinions. We went through the funeral process as a family. We tried to have family dinner together still. This kept us strong even in turmoil. I am so thankful for that, because if we would have all turned away from each other, it would have been a lot harder to deal with. In Chinese writing, the word crisis has the sign for danger, but it also has the sign for opportunity. So, when we go through trials, we have two options. We can just see the danger and let it break us apart, or we can seize the opportunity to learn and grow together. The meaning of coping is making minute adjustments so that things fit together seamlessly, even when under pressure. So, let’s take the opportunity to learn coping skills as a family now, so that when problems do arise, our family still fits together seamlessly. If you have any stories or experiences you could share about coping, times of crisis, or even how your family has created strong habits, please comment! I would love to hear your opinions/experiences! (Also, I encourage you to comment on any of my other posts!)
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